The Great Debate

There is a great debate going on in my head. It is stronger than the legendary Lincoln Douglass debate. I can say this with credibility as a former coach with the NFL (National Forensic League). Don’t believe me? Check out my stats. Not too impressive, I know, but there nevertheless.

OK on to the pressing topic. I have a war going on inside of me! WOW an upgrade from a debate? See what all this sideline talking is doing to a person?

First, the “good side.  I  have a little voice telling me to eat healthy and exercise. It reminds me that with hard work and dedication I will see results. It reminds me I have too much junk in my trunk and if I wanna hurt less when I perform I need to lose some of the extra. It is happy with the 3 pounds I have lost so far and believes I can lose even more within the next month. It tells me the sooner I lose weight the sooner I can back off a little and maintain. It responds to pictures like the following:

On the other side…the “bad side”.  I have a little voice telling me not to worry too much. It says I can make “reasonable” choices even if they are not restricting. It tells me I don’t NEED to lose weight I just WANT to. It tells me I am lovely in my own right and if I want that pizza or cookie or whatever I should go for it. It thinks a 3 mile run actually helps burn fat and calories. It says Jillian is a meanie and doesn’t even DO her own workout in the video! It responds to pictures like the following:

Mind you I AM being good-ish. I’ve set myself up for a 500 calorie deficit each day whenever possible. Yes, I am still eating 1200 or more cals a day in the process. This leads to A LOT of working out. Which isn’t too bad since I have all this free time and I need a strong fitness base for the 50K in July. It is bad because…well…I get lazy! Weekends get here and I wanna lay around by the pool or walk casually or eat out or everything “normal” people do! I hate how one meal at Applebee’s is like 2 days worth of calories. WHY? I hate that I can’t sit down and stuff my face and love the flavor without wondering the rest of the day how I can burn those cals off. How many miles running or riding? Of elliptical? Of walking?

Then I remember how I look and feel in “cute” clothes. In clothes someone my age should be wearing. And I imagine myself dancing at a night club or walking along a beach and feeling confident…and not being overheated by all the layers I feel the need to wear to cover up. I imagine going on a date and having the guy say “Wow you look GOOD” when I wear a nice dress and knowing it’s not just a line. I think of these things…and I  drag myself up off my butt or away from the chips and dip. It’s a balancing act…but when I figure it out I can have it all. No, really I can!

And a little piece of insight (well personal opinion) you know how people always say you’ll start craving healthy food? Like last night I overheard two ladies discussing how to make their husbands be vegetarian or vegan and then how to raise children the same way. This is of course a topic for another day…but I wanna share that it is TRUE. I find the healthier I eat the healthier I want to eat. However for me…the craving for junk doesn’t go away. Instead of wanting cookies and pizza and burgers…I find I want a nice crisp salad, a lean chicken breast and rice, a glass of water as one of my meals and the junk as my other meal. I have never had my cravings for junk go away. This is why I need a balance. Or to give up…but balance sounds like a better option.

2 thoughts on “The Great Debate

  1. I think all of us have that battle inside at some point or another if we're attempting to live a healthier life. I know I do at least. My son's oncologist, who is a brilliant doctor, avid runner,and a cyclist, said this to me:

    “It's not about what you do 10% of the time. It's 90% that counts. And if you slip up, build an immediate action plan to correct the mistake instead of letting it fester and get out of control. It will be easier to fix.”

    Coming from him, that is advice I will take!

    Good luck. Hugs!

    Sarah @ Thinfluenced

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